Caption: Intently Listening
URL: http://www.providermagazine.com/archives/archives-2012/Pages/1212/Create-A-Caring-Culture.aspx
We live in a world in which we are easily distracted by
technology, others, and our own thoughts. With so many things competing for our
attention, we must diligently make an effort to focus on the one who truly
matters in the counseling relationship, the client. This implies that we must
be present in the relationship. Carl Rogers indicated that presence is a state
in which we are completely absorbed in the relationship (Young, 2017). This not
only requires a greater focus on the client, but it also requires a right
attitude when working with the client.
According
to Shipley (2010), one must have a person-centered attitude based on
unconditional positive regard, empathy, and congruence. Furthermore, counselors
should possess a benevolent attitude in which they desire to do good to others.
Having this benevolent attitude will help the counselor focus on the client
instead of worrying about what to ask next or their own mental noise (Young,
2017). In fact, a benevolent connection between the therapist and client helps
create a supportive atmosphere that can increase the opportunity for greater
client change (Ackerman & Hilsenroth, 2003).
While
techniques are emphasized and skills are frequently focused on, it is essential
to remember that possessing the correct attitude matters most. Anyone can learn
listening skills and techniques, but not everyone will have a heart of
genuineness, acceptance, and empathy. As we learn to focus on our attitudes
first, we will notice that the skills and techniques are easier to develop
because we genuinely care about the client. Active listening is not just about
listening skill but listening attitude as well (Shipley, 2010). Therefore, it
is essential to maintain a healthy balance and continue learning so that we can
help our clients achieve a state of wellness in the future.
References
Ackerman, S. J.,
& Hilsenroth, M. J. (2003). A review of therapist characteristics and
techniques positively impacting the therapeutic alliance. Clinical
psychology review, 23(1), 1-33.
Shipley, S. D.
(2010, April). Listening: A concept analysis. In Nursing forum (Vol.
45, No. 2, pp. 125-134). Blackwell Publishing Inc.
Young, M. E.
(2012). Learning the art of helping: Building blocks and techniques.
Pearson Higher Ed.
Joe, thank you for your post. I like that you mentioned the importance of the counselor’s attitude. I could not agree with you more. When I think about this fact, it makes complete sense. A counselor could have all the book knowledge in the world, but that does not translate into a good counselor. Having the right attitude actually initiates the desire for us to learn new skills and techniques that will contribute to the client’s well-being. This proper attitude helps us to put aside all outside distractions in order to focus on the task at hand, which as you said, is attending to the client.
ReplyDeleteJoe,
ReplyDeleteI agree that we live in a world where we constantly have different people or responsibilities fighting for our attention. In a counseling setting, clients should receive undivided attention from their counselor. Personally, when I do not feel like someone is listening to me, it makes me frustrated and I tend to shut down. If I am talking with someone and they start looking at their phone or if they place their focus somewhere else, I usually stop talking because I can sense that they are not listening. I cannot imagine how it would make a client feel if their counselor failed to give them proper attention. You made a very interesting point that being present with a client is not only about our focus on the client, but it also includes our attitude. As counselors, if we enter a session without the right attitude, we will have a negative effect on the environment and quality of the session. We must facilitate a therapeutic atmosphere for our clients where they feel welcomed, accepted, and heard. Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this topic.
Kaitlin
Joseph,
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading your post. Rogers took the position that in the therapeutic environment the client comes first. The therapist should offer unconditional positive regard, be authentic and transparent in the relationship, and express genuine empathy. His approach was not to give advice, but, instead, to be fully present and to offer the client the gift of his listening. When we sit across from a hurting individual, our attitude should be one of humility and grace. From a spiritual integrative perspective, it is a humbling realization to think that God would invite us to share in His work as ministers of unconditional grace, presence, and authentic care.